Had to use that title this week (thank you, KAL!). I’d gotten fed up with an iPhone problem, where tracks weren’t copying over correctly from Itunes. You could fix it by unsyncing the music, then resyncing it and forcing it to recopy some fourteen thousand tracks over, but I finally said, OK, maybe time for new phone. I had a late afternoon doctor’s appointment on Wednesday, so afterward, I went to the Grand Central Apple Store. Plunked my current phone (an SE), and C’s phone (nicer and newer than mine, but still years-old now) on the counter, and asked if I could give them two phones and get one back. ‘yes’, as it turned out – C’s phone got me a $300 credit, and mine was like $85, and I paid money for the rest, for a nice new Iphone 15.
Then I had to sit in the backroom as the new phone copied everything from the old phone. That all worked – as far as data and programs. But the eSim thingie that makes a phone a phone refused to jump over, and by then it was getting late. So I left with a beautiful new handheld computer, but no cell phone. This was mildly problematic the next morning, but I called Spectrum and (with the help of my computer and a QR code) got the new phone to be a phone. Then I had to play some games with work to get MS Authenticator to work. (I try to log into Authenticator. It asks for the code generated by Authenticator. And around we go.) But they reset things and my new phone was fully working by mid-morning. I like it a lot! Except the original problem with the tracks still keeps happening, and I’m assuming it’s an Itunes problem now, and am trying something different with the backup.
Have definitely felt more like I’m on a raft rather than a rowboat, last few weeks, just floating where the current takes me. But things are getting done.
Let’s see. If C’s death was the boat sinking under me, and the last couple of years has been me swimming to shore, I’d say 2024 has been me gasping on the shore and figure out where to go next. So, basically, this is ‘normal’ now and it feels ‘normal’. Not necessarily good, but not disconcertingly wrong either.
I had a nice little cubicle conversation with a co-worker, where something that C and I had done came up in conversation and I just offhandedly mentioned how much I missed him and she asked if I was doing OK. And we sort of clarified where I am now – which is I have the rest of my life ahead of me, and I can basically make it anything I want… but I can’t have that any more. Not that I can’t have a loving partnership with another person, but my life with Charles (half my life, basically) is not an option any more. So I will continue to be grateful that we did have a life together, and how wonderful it was.
As part of my vague life plans to get out and live (thanks, Auntie Mame), I’ve kind of been thinking in terms of not only trying to go see some sort of performance every week or so, but getting myself out in public specifically to meet gentlemen. I was going to go two-stepping last weekend, but it was pissing rain on Saturday and the slog of getting home from the city via public transportation or taxi late on a weekend evening is annoying/daunting enough without that. So I stayed in and cooked and knitted and watched a movie and that was fine.
But this weekend was completely open and last night, I decided to go into town and go to a couple of bars I’ve been meaning to check out (or re-check out, except I haven’t been to either one in forever). Let’s go have drinks, then get dinner, then have more drinks, then go home. Nothing more than I was willing to handle. I headed out from my home around 6:00. I’d figured most of the St. Paddy’s Day stuff would happen today (Sunday), but there were a fair mount of drunk or drunk-wannabe kids in green outfits and Mardi Gras beads on the train. And once I hit the Village, there were a zillion people out (it was a nice night).
I went to Ty’s, probably for the first time since the 90’s. It was pretty crowded, but it was perfect – in that pretty much the entire clientele was my demographic and mostly my type, too. Hey, they had Angry Orchard on draft, so I got one and very quickly got sucked… into a conversation with some welcoming regulars. I stayed for two ciders, had a fantastic time, made some new buddies, maybe smooched one or two, and now have found a very obvious ‘3rd space’ to revisit. I haven’t had that good a time in a bar in a long long time.
I thought about staying, but was drinking on a mostly empty stomach and that’s a bad idea, so I went over to Cowgirl and somehow managed to get a table even thought it was packed. Had a decent dinner while reading my Kindle, then went down to the river to check out Rockbar. I’d been there more recently than Ty’s …. so like maybe 10 years ago, not 30… they were charging a cover, annoying, but OK. And all their draft beer things were not working. So I had a bottle of cider and sat in a stool and observed. There was one gentleman who was clearly intrigued and started working his way closer and closer, but I was not at all interested and very determinedly gave him no eyeball encouragement. I’m glad he figured it out before he actually tried to strike up a conversation. As rusty and basic as my bar skills are, they do still seem to be there, good to know.
The F and the E were both running (although the 7 was not) and I made it home 11-ish. It still seems a lot of work to come all the way into town just to go to bars. (I was telling one of my new friends at Ty’s, it was tremendously convenient when I went to school in Baltimore and was coming out, that most of the bars were at most a 10 minute walk from my apartment.) But much as I like the Jackson Heights bar Hombres, I’m having a better time going to Uncle Charlie’s, Ninth Avenue Saloon, and now Ty’s. There’s hope for this socially anxious widower yet.
Oh, yes, so last weekend was the Oscars. For awards shows, Mariah and Josh usually invite me up and I bring bubbly (and, this time, banana bread) and we have dinner and watch and comment. I’d remembered that the show itself has really been pretty good these last few years – this year was good, but not great, with some jokes falling terribly flat. Some wonderful moments, though, like Kate McKinnon and the Batman thing and “I’m Just Ken”. I guess they didn’t have a chance during the show to show Jodie Foster and Robert DeNiro together, but I later saw a picture of them hugging – they were both nominated for Taxi Driver forty-eight years ago. Gah.
I loved having 5 previous winners announce the nominees for the acting categories – although it seemed to work best for supporting actress. I was very happy with all the winners, including Emma Stone, who I thought was amazing.
I’d finally seen Oppenheimer (in chunks, as a miniseries) the week before the Oscars, and wasn’t surprised when it won, but not thrilled either. However, it was clear from watching the movie that it would benefit from a rewatch, so I will do that at some point. My picks for best picture would have been American Fiction, The Holdovers or Poor Things.
I also went to a choral concert on Tuesday at Carnegie Hall with Patti and Tessa. (Patti’s brother-in-law Chris and his wife Karen, from Montana, were singing.) The theme was I Choose Love, and it was deliberately multi-cultural. I didn’t know any of the music, but it was lovely. The University of Montana School of Music’s chamber choir opened the half with a few numbers, then were joined by Chris and Karen’s choir, and a couple of others for the rest. It was really nice, but they were only on the first half, and we chose to bug out at intermission. I did finally get to meet Chris and Karen, who I’ve known of for forever. So that was nice.
Nice empty week coming up, except I fly to Toronto on Saturday for the weekend and then a conference Monday/Tuesday – and I’ve really not planned it at all. So I need to get on that.
Enjoy the week(s)!
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